The “bitter” boarding method airlines won’t use🧂😅 | QI – BBC

The “bitter” boarding method airlines won’t use🧂😅 | QI – BBC

Now, nothing is more likely
to cause a quarrel than a badly ordered queue. So my question is what’s
the best way to board a plane? The people are in the lounge,
and you want to board them onto the plane. What’s the most
efficient way of doing that? Minimise hand baggage. All those
wankers who can’t be bothered to check their bags in. Come on like mules, like pack mules. Fill up all the overhead lockers.
with their very important shit. LAUGHTER Then they sit down, farting
all the way to Malaga. Sorry, what was the question? LAUGHTER There’s a lot of bitterness
in this, isn’t there? I had a moment on a flight
last week, actually, when I was flying from
Aberdeen to Shetland, and I was with my tour manager,
who’s also a big chap, and we sit next to each
other cos we’re pals, and there was hardly anyone
else on the flight. It was only a small plane. And the stewardess
came over, and she said, “Mr Manford, Mr Isaacs,” she said,
“would you mind separating “and sitting on either side
of the plane?” LAUGHTER Oh, no. Weight distribution.
Weight distribution! You’re as heavy as a wing. What, so he’s going to land like
this if we…? Well, that’s what you should
have done. We will at the start, but during the flight, we’re going
to set you a series of challenges. Zig-zagging about the plane. First time in the history of the
world where turbulence is a person. That’s how I’m going to think of you
now, as turbulent. That’s me. By the back row, then the
next row, then the next row. That is the most common. Yeah, that
is the most common way of doing it. It is also the least efficient. Or in the middle and then fan it out
towards the back and the front. Take the top off the plane… LAUGHTER ..let them all swarm in over
the top like ants. So there’s an astrophysicist
called Dr Jason Steffen. He made a computer model, and then
he teamed up with a TV producer to get people to act
out boarding planes in various different arrangements. So he compared boarding from the
front, from the back, at random, and what he called Wilma boarding –
which is window, middle, and then aisle… Nice. Block
boarding, by far the slowest. That’s the way the airlines
currently do it, so they say, “This group of seats,
and then the next group of seats.” The absolute best way
to do it is board first the even-numbered window seats
followed by the odd-numbered window seats,
then repeat with the middle seats, and then repeat
with the aisle seats. It’s rather complicated, and so he actually recommends
just board at random. That would still be much faster
than what we currently do. You don’t want too random,
though, do you? You don’t want to be, like, 16
rows back, and the pilot’s there. LAUGHTER I was boarding recently,
and this lady announced, “We are boarding everyone
not in zone F.” And then she said, “And also
not in zone A, B, C, D, E.” Then she paused and said,
“We’re just not boarding.” LAUGHTER

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44 Replies to “The “bitter” boarding method airlines won’t use🧂😅 | QI – BBC”

  1. Well good thing I'm a sasquatch and don't ever fly, so I don't even have to worry about this stuff

  2. Flying is not Value for the Money. the time, inconvenience, head aches, stinky crowds, terrible service and security waits are a lot of crap for the luxury privilege of flying. I'd rather take a train or a bus. yes a BUS. Greyhound buses are better than Southwest Airlines ANY DAY

  3. Youtube is changing for the worse. In the past I'd be recommended some interesting zany vid, created by a dude behind his computer/camera. Now I'm being mostly recommended this type of mindless crap from big corporations. I shouldn't have clicked on this, and regret wasting 3 minutes of my life. I gave up watching TV 20 years ago to get away from this time-wasting mindless shyte, and now it's metastasising youtube 🙁

  4. Huh. So the title is the same as a CGP Grey video. Lots of people seem to care about that. Out of the many ways you could title a video about this exact subject, two videos went with the same one. The comments section is very concerned.

    A surprising number of people think this whole video is ripped off from CGP Grey simply because they talk about the same topic and the same researcher who is an expert on that topic… those people don't know what ripping things off is – but you'll see people make that complaint any time some other channel talks about a topic that a channel they like has talked about at any point in the past. If that was what ripping things off was, then CGP Grey ripped off his video from Jason Steffen, the researcher who did all the work explaining this stuff in the first place.


  5. If the airports all had a grid of squares with row numbers and seat letters on the floor at the departure gate, all the messing around could be done in an open space with no seats to get in the way. Just a thought.

  6. Everyone complaining about copying CGP Grey lmao. I agree that the title is a ripoff but Vox did a video on airplane boarding methods 4 years ago, even before CGP Grey did. So while I agree that the YouTube/social media account person needs to be more creative, the topic itself isn't "stolen". And even if the progress of how Sandi explains the experiment is similar, of course it is, because she's describing the procedure and the results. It's really not that big a deal.

  7. I will concede that boarding without seat assignments (like Southwest does here in the US) is more efficient, but I get so anxious when I don't have a specific seat assigned to me.

  8. According to my own studies, I actually learned the most inefficient way to board a plane was to ride in with your unicycle.

  9. Good heavens folks. Just because they chatted about the same thing doesn’t mean they “stole” CGP Greys idea. I mean, it’s interesting information that is publicly available.

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